NFL blogging at its finest
NFL Preseason Football is finally here. I haven’t been able to look into what’s been going on with the AFCW teams other than the Raiders (who look amazing, FTR), so I won’t be able to offer much insight. Let me know in the comments tho. How was your team’s training camp gone? Are the changes made this offseason sounding promising? Everyone staying healthy?
fuck your teams.
It’s conference championship weekend; and I’d never thought I’d say this… it’s good to see the Broncos in it. No more Chiiieeeeeeffffssss.
Patriots at Broncos – I have this game as a toss up. No Nix is bad, bad for Broncos… but that defense will keep them in it. Patriots keep Broncos offense in check too. I’ve been proven wrong on HC Sean Payton, and I’m ready to eat my crow. I think he pulls out a couple surprises to score just enough to beat the Patriots 16-13, and advance to the Super Bowl.
On the NFC side… another very weird thing to say 4 months ago, but the Seattle Seahawks are looking dominant. I don’t see them slowing down this weekend, and take care of the Rams 27-20.
Enjoy the matchups this weekend.
Balls
Hey dudes,
So the site is laggy and we need a new article to combat the influx of comments we’re bound to receive after Tomorrow Night (great Steel Panther song). Oh, yeah, the BoltShow begins Tomorrow Night. Yeah, I was surprised too. We’re here, maybe not all there, but let’s digress. Football is back, but definitely not great again (as we were promised).
I think all 4 teams improved on paper, how well that translates to dubs and Nelson laughs, well, that’s for the wise guys to figure out. But I’ll slap my nards on the table and go full homeslice.
LA 13-4
Denver 11-6
KC 11-6
LV 9-8
I’m probably wrong every year, so take my predictions with a fraction of a grain of anal.
⚡☝️
As I reenter the room, you should start to hear Mark Morrison’s, Return of the Mack start to play. In other words, I’m back bitches! I have missed you fuckbois quite a bit but let’s not get all mushy. We are a little over a week away from the draft so let’s rock and roll.
This is a 3 round Mock for each team in the division. I know, I know, you don’t agree with my picks but what else is new. There are no trades which we all know won’t happen.
LAS VEGAS RAIDERS
Top Needs: RB, WR, CB
Round 1: RB Ashton Jeanty
The Raiders had the worse running game in the NFL last year and that will not due in Uncle Pete’s overall scheme. Enter Jeanty, who is the most complete back in this draft.
Round 2: WR Jayden Higgins
Talk about a perfect fit for what Chip Kelly likes in a receiver. Higgins is not just an “X” receiver but can line up anywhere on the field and is an excellent route runner.
Round 3: CB Darien Porter
Big, long and fast, that describes Porter. He is an ideal fit in Uncle Pete’s defensive scheme, a Riq Woolen 2.0 if you will.
DENVER BRONCOS
Top Needs: RB, WR, IDL
Round 1: RB Omarion Hampton
After Javonte Williams left in free agency, the Broncos are very thin at running back. Enter Hampton. He is a true RB1 bell cow back that is also a great receiver out of the backfield.
Round 2: WR Tre Harris
There is a true #1 on this team (Courtland Sutton) but not much else. Tre Harris is a big receiver with the ability to win at every level.
Round 3: DT Shemar Turner
The Broncos will need to add some depth to their defensive line. Shemar Turner is a perfect fit for the team and will challenge for playing time immediately.
LOS ANGELES CHARGERS
Top Needs: TE, WR, RB
Round 1: TE Colston Loveland
The Chargers need weapons on offense with TE being the biggest one. Colston Loveland is a perfect fit and would be a huge upgrade.
Round 2: WR Jaylin Noel
Ladd McConkey was a steal last year, but every other receiver is average at best. Enter Jaylin Noel. He is a complete receiver with kick return chops. He has speed to go deep but is also a volume receiver.
Round 3: RB Dylan Sampson
In free agency, the Chargers signed RB Najee Harris but it was only for 1 year. RB Dylan Sampson led the SEC in rushing yards (1,491) and touchdowns (22). He is a bit undersized but has the running instincts of a seasoned veteran.
KANSAS CITY CHIEFS
Top Needs: IDL, OT, DE
Round 1: DT Kenneth Grant
The Chiefs must fix the trenches on both sides of the ball. Enter DT Kenneth Grant. He is a Nose Tackle that is fantastic against the run and has some pass rush juice. This would be a steal.
Round 2: OT Aireontae Ersery
The Chiefs signed OT Jaylon Moore in free agency but he was primarily a back-up with 49ers. OT Ersery is a HUGE OT with 3 years as a starter and strong as an ox. He would challenge for a starting position from day one.
Round 3: DE Kyle Kennard
The Chiefs did not have a single player with double digit sacks and that has to change. DE Kyle Kennard will add instant juice to the pass rush. He also has some zone coverage abilities.
This is going to be one of the most intriguing drafts in a long time as it is crazy deep at a few positions (RB, DT, DE) and lacking in others (QB, S, LB). How this thing will fall is anyone’s guess, but one thing is for sure, its going to be nuts. Buckle-up boys because the NFL draft is right around the corner!
The playoffs are again upon us. Let’s see if my playoff predicktions go any better than the regular season.
AFC Wild Card Round –
LA Chargers @ Houston Texans – Chargers are slightly fraudulent. They’re not very good. I think the Texans defense dominates, forces at least 4 Justin Herbert INT’s, maybe even block a FG and return it for a TD. 32-12, Texans.
Pittsburgh Steelers @ Baltimore Ravens – All Ravens, Steelers’ offense isn’t going to be able to keep up. After a regular season matchup that saw nothing but FG’s, I’m predicting all touchdowns in this one. 28-14, Ravens.
Denver Broncos @ Buffalo Bills – Denver’s defense is strong, and the offense and their rookie QB is getting better at the right time. If they were playing anyone in the AFC other than the Bills in Buffalo, I’d be inclined to pick them, but I’m not picking against the Bills on their home turf in January. 27-23, Buffalo.
If this is how the games play out, it will be Texans at Chiefs and Ravens at Bills next week. Both very intriguing matchups.
NFL Wild Card Round –
Green Bay Packers @ Philadelphia Eagles – Eagles offense is up and down, but I have them winning this one, 26-21.
Washington Commanders @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers – Another tough one to pick, I’m finally going to go with a road team, Commanders over Buccaneers 31-27.
Minnesota Vikings vs LA Rams – The Vikings had a pretty magical regular season, but I think the magic ends. LA Rams find a way to break the Vikings hearts in the playoffs yet again, 23-21.
This would make for a divisional round that sees the LA Rams playing at the Detroit Lions, and the Washington Commanders playing at the Philadelphia Eagles next week.
All hail the Chiefs.
Very quick post to get something new up.
Chiefs – Still good, especially the defense in 2024. When they get some of their receivers back, they will be even better, which is bad news for the league as they’re sitting at 7-0 and are the defending champs.
Chargers – Up and down early on in 2024. Typical Chargers. I expect that to continue a tad, but ultimately playing better ball in the 2nd half of the season.
Broncos – Haven’t watched them much. Defense is good, offense is not. Should hover around .500 ball feels like.
Raiders – LolRaiders… they do finally appeared to be committed to the tank job in 2024. QB Gardner Minshew cementing these efforts with continued costly turnovers.
Football sucks.
The 2024 NFL Season is upon us, and its time for Balls’ annual AFCW Predicktions. This is always met with plenty of bitching and moaning, but at the end of the season, I have a knack for hitting more than I miss. For example, when I’m being a homer and predicting more wins than Vegas or the mainstream media for the Raiders, the Raiders have hit 4 of the last 5 season win totals for the Raiders, when you guessed it, I predicted the Under. Ouch, that hurts. Or when I “hated” on the PFM Broncos for predicting they’d with the Super Bowl in the 2015 season despite PFM being dog shit, but the NFL needing his Swan Song season. I’ve picked the Chiefs to win the AFCW and more for like ever at this point, yet Poe’s bitchass still seems disrespected by my Chiefs predictions. Chargers? I’ve been pretty close, hard to be too far up and down from a team that is so incredibly mediocre, unless you’re retarded, the NFL Media, or Chargers fans who actually think these teams were anything special in the last forever.
So take whatever opinion you think the next 60 seconds of reading as it relates to my thoughts on your team’s season, ball it up, and throw it in the fucking trash, because yours truly has been way more hit than miss. So just sit this one out for once. Your Balls 2024 NFL/AFCW Predicktions!!
AFCW Standings Predicktions:
Kansas City Chiefs (13-4): They’re in year 6 of the (let’s get some tape on Patrick before we crown him) Mahomes Era… He’s still good. Reid’s good, defense is good. I do question a little of everything around them; but it ultimately is rooted in the idea of, can they possibly win 3 straight?? I’ll say no, moreso because of the odds. The odds they can lose a game vs a few contending AFC teams in playoffs or the NFC contender in the SB. The odds the receiving options can be good enough for Mahomes, the odds the OL/Defense can continue to be a strength surrounding him, and lets be honest, the odds the NFL will continue to allow them via officiating/etc. At some point, Chiefs ruling the NFL may not be great for business no matter how much you try to subsidize it (i.e. Mahomes, Kelce, Swifties, etc). Either way, Chiefs win the AFC West easily.
Las Vegas Raiders (9-8): Honestly, you could draw the next 3 teams out of a hat in my opinion. I think they’re all that close. I think the Raiders have the track record against their interdivision opponents, and the ability to matchup outside of it well enough to “earn” 2nd place in the AFCW, but outside of the playoffs and any semblance of contending for the NFL Championship. Pieces of their defense will shine, while others prove to be a liability at times. The receiving corps might be the best in the AFCW, but with Gardner Minshew at QB and an up and down OL/run game to support them, there will be some offensive dry spells.
Los Angeles Chargers (7-10): It’s hard to predict a losing season for a Jim Harbaugh led team. I have a lot of respect for the man. He was on the short list for replacing Jon Gruden for my Raiders in recent years. While I share a lot of the same respect for QB Justin Herbert, I’ve also long pointed out his shortfalls including rather uniquely circumstantial losses featuring late game giveaways, it’s hard for me to hitch my wagon to despite my respect for HC Harbaugh. There are simply too many questions surrounding him on offense, take your pick, OL, RB’s, TE’s, WR’s. There are also those underlying issues on a historically bad Brandon Staley’s Charger Defense.
Denver Broncos (6-11): It’s definitely not as hard to predict a losing season for a Denver Broncos team that has been losing for quite some time. Despite his ego, Sean Payton does not strike fear in the NFL/AFCW. He found that out in 2023. Their -56 Point Differential (which was an improvement from -72 in 2022) was still somehow good to finish 2nd in the AFCW at 8-9. The Broncos feature a rookie QB (whom I have grown to like in the offseason training process), with a mediocre offense around him, and a defense that I question as being the “strength” it’s being perceived as going into the season. This team has finished last in the AFCW 3 of the last 4 seasons. Only last season did they manage to crawl their way out despite the point differential. With the potential at QB, a few other pieces, and if HC Payton can regain success in the NFL, they have as good of chance as any to return to AFCW “Glory” (i.e. 2nd place behind the Chiefs).
Those season team predicktions of the AFCW were a bit doom and gloomy. My apologies, but I do think it’s another down year for the AFCW outside of the Chiefs winning and contending for another SB. Let’s focus on some high notes. As stated, Mahomes is still MVP favorite, Maxx Crosby should be firmly in the NFL Defensive POY race followed shortly by Khalil Mack, Joey Bosa, Chris Jones, etc. QB Bo Nix of Denver definitely has OROY potential, as well as TE Brock Bowers of the LV Raiders. There are plenty of reasons for AFC West fans to be excited for the 2o24 campaign, but I believe it should be focused around the building blocks for 3 of the 4 teams, with the Chiefs being the outlier as far as 2024 Playoff contention looking for the Super Bowl 3-Peat.
2024 NFL Predicktions:
AFC Playoff Teams (in seeded order): 1. Chiefs, 2. Texans, 3. Dolphins, 4. Ravens, 5. Bengals, 6. Jets, 7. Jaguars.
NFC Playoff Teams (in seeded order): 1. Lions, 2. Rams, 3. Eagles, 4. Falcons. 5. 49ers, 6. Packers, 7. Cowboys
AFC Championship: Texans over Jets, 27-23.
NFC Championship: Lions over Rams 31-20.
Super Bowl: Lions over Texans 30-24.
Individual Awards:
MVP – Jared Goff, Detroit Lions
Defensive POY – Maxx Crosby, Las Vegas Raiders
Offensive POY – Tyreek Hill, Miami Dolphins
Offensive ROY – Caleb Williams, Chicago Bears
Defensive ROY – Dallas Turner, Minnesota Vikings
Coach OTY – DeMeco Ryans, Houston Texans
Comeback Player of the Year – Aaron Rodgers, New York Jets.
As NFL Training Camps start this week, can’t help but think this is the quietest summer I can remember in some time in the AFCW. Nothing significant on the trade block (unless you believe Davante Adams is on it, which I don’t), no holdouts appear imminent, minimal other drama.
No news is good news this time of year, as far as I’m concerned. I believe teams like the Broncos and Raiders could still make a couple key additions with the cap space they have and need for influx in talent at a couple positions. Otherwise, these teams appear focused with who they have in the building and ready to prep for their 2024 campaign.